Dancing with Mommy

Karis turned 6 weeks on friday. I was looking forward to the 6 week mark becuase a lot of places I read that at 6 weeks babies are able to start sleeping better on their own. Of course you have to help them to learn but their ability to self calm starts to improve around this point. I have been struggling the last week or so because it seems like Karis' sleep patterns were getting worse not better and I was getting exhausted with trying to get her to sleep. I noticed that my impatience started increasing ( which probably had a lot to do with sleep deprivation and hormones). But nonetheless, my attitude was starting to go down hill. I kept doing research to find out if there was something I could do to help Karis fall asleep easier. Some days it was taking me an hour to get her to fall asleep every time she needed a nap and then she would only sleep for 15 minutes and wake up again to eat. This wouldn't be as big of a problem if I didn' t have Raegan to care for too and I began to feel like I was neglecting her. Basically I was really wearing down. My parents offered to take Raegan to my brothers house for the weekend for my nephews birthday and Raegan was very excited about that. We thought it would be a great chance for her to get away and have some fun and it would give Josh and I a chance to catch up on sleep a little and get a little break. We missed Raegan terribly but everytime we would call to check on her she didn't even want to stop playing to talk to us. On friday night Karis had a pretty rough night with waking up a lot. On saturday we went to run some errands and I decided to get a lullaby CD at the Christian Bookstore. On saturday night I got Karis ready for bed and turned on the music bought. I gave her a little infant massage and swaddled her and then I started the usual routine of bouncing her and walking her around to get her to fall asleep. As I listened to the music this time it relaxed me and helped me to focus and suddenly I was no longer worried about how long it was going to take me to get her to sleep. I started dancing with my daughter to the beautiful music. Tears flowed down my face as I was able to shift my focus from thinking about how tired and worn out I was to how blessed I am to have her and to have Raegan. I began to pray for both of my girls and thank God for them as I danced around the room with Karis in my arms. Karis melted away off to sleep as I danced with her and getting her to go to sleep suddenly became not a tiring ordeal but instead a precious memory. I found myself staring at my beautiful daughter and thinking about my other beautiful daughter and just thanking God for both of them. God gave me a renewed strength and focus during this time. Now I can't wait until bedtime each night so I can dance with Karis again.

One Month Old!

It's hard to believe Karis is already 1 month old! Where does the time go? It seems like just yesterday we were bringing her home from the hospital. I'm not sure how much she weighs now or how tall she is but I think she is continuing to grow in both ways! I thought Raegan was a big baby but I think Karis has her beat! Karis is still doing well. She has a hard time falling asleep on her own especially at night. So there is a lot of swaddling, bouncing, swaying, and shushing going on here. It's tiring because she is so heavy and sitting down to get her to sleep doesn't seem to cut it. Thankfully I got the sling that I ordered in the mail and she really likes that. She seems to conk out whenever I put her in it ( for the most part). Hopefully she will start to fall asleep easier soon though! Karis also had her first big girl bath this week. She did well other than the fact that after we were done she decided to make a #2 in the tub so we had to give her a bath all over again. I guess she was relaxed! Now we keep a diaper on her until the end and things are working out much better. Karis also took a bottle from daddy for the first time. She didn't seem thrilled with the idea but she did drink from it so that means that on occasion maybe mommy can get out by herself! Raegan is still doing well with her. She has jealousy issues at times ( probably because it seems like I spend my whole day trying to get Karis to sleep or to stay asleep). But she has enjoyed all of the big sister gifts and cards she has received from everyone so thank you to everyone who has been so thoughtful to include her! Raegan has gotten to watch a lot more "shows" lately though as a result so she probably won't be happy when her sister doesn't need so much assistance because that means a lot less TV for Raegan. But we are all doing good, tired but good!

3 Weeks!

This started out a little rough for Mommy! We had a nice long weekend with having Josh home and both girls were doing really well. I thought on monday morning when it was time for Josh to go back to work that I would be fine for my first full day on my own. But the girls both decided to make it a hard transition for me. I couldn't get Karis to go to sleep and the only thing that would get her to settle down was walking around and bouncing her. This wouldn't normally be that big of a deal except my incision was still pretty sore and I was still supposed to be taking it somewhat easy and Karis is not a small baby! So I was getting exhausted quickly. And Raegan was acting up probably due to Josh going back to work. My patience ended when Raegan dumped all of her toys out of her boxes all over the floor. I called Josh and couldn't hold back my tears. He decided to come home early to help me out which I appreciated! Later on in the day Josh's mom decided to come as well. So she came to visit and help out for a few days. It was nice for her to be able to come and meet Karis and get to spend time with Raegan as well. We were thankful for her help as well. Raegan was still acting up this week ( again I think she just wants things to be back to normal) but towards the end of the week she started doing much better. She even wanted to hold Karis this week. We had been asking her if she wanted to hold the baby and she kept saying no. We asked her again this week and she said yes she did and she got very excited about it. We got some cute pictures of them together and it was a sweet moment for me. Another sweet moment this week was one evening when Josh took Raegan out to walk Kona and I had placed Karis on her playmat for a few minutes. I was in the kitchen but I heard Raegan come back upstairs and I peaked around the corner to see what she was doing. She saw Karis laying on her mat and Raegan ran right over to her and started showing Karis the toys that were hanging. She was very gentle and she seemed excited to pay attention to her little sister. It was such a sweet moment for me and it brought tears to my eyes. I know the adjustment has been hard on Raegan but I also believe deep down that she really loves her little sister even if she doesn't always show it. I cherish these sweet moments when I see my two girls together.

Karis continues to do well. She is going down for naps easier during the day and is sleeping longer stretches at night. She has a hard time falling asleep at night but once she is asleep she usually has a longer stretch of sleep. So I have been getting a little bit more sleep which was much needed! So all in all we are getting adjusted to our precious new addition to our family! And Karis seems to be getting adjusted to life with us!