The Gift of a Child

I find myself getting more sentimental this Christmas than I have in the past. Every year I tell myself that I want to focus on the true meaning of Christmas and yet every year I seem to fall into the same trap of focusing more on the Christmas traditions of family, food, presents than I do on the reason we celebrate, Jesus. But this year although I have made my fair share of Christmas cookies and bought gifts for everyone, this year I have found that the meaning of Christmas has finally hit home.

I have been reflecting a lot on what happened on that first Christmas this year. I have also been reflecting a lot on what this Christmas means to us. We watched the Nativity Story a couple of nights ago for the first time and it really helped put into perspective what happened that night. I really imagined what Mary must have been going through. I can't even imagine all of the emotions she felt, fear, excitement, joy maybe even embarrassment. I was really struck by the power of what God brought about that night. He chose to use a baby. Why a baby? Why not a big powerful man sent down from heaven. Why didn't He just come down himself and take care of what needed to be done? Why didn't He just come down and wipe out sin and all of the sinners with it? Why? Because that wasn't in His plan. Why else? Because He loved us too much to do that. Why did He use a baby? Well, the other night it hit me. I think that sending a baby was the most powerful thing He could have done.

This year, I have been reflecting on our baby. I have been reflecting on the Chrismas's we have had over the past couple of years. They were painful. As hard as I wanted them not to be they were. I loved being around all of my nephews and nieces on Christmas, I love them all as if they were my own children. But the pain of not having our own child cut deep. Last year over Christmas we were waiting to hear if we were going to be parents. We were waiting while a young 18 year old woman made a decision on who she would choose to be the parents of her baby. That baby is Raegan.

I can't help but think about the power of babies. God sent His own son in the most important and powerful act in history. Jesus was born in a manger, surrounded by animals. He was born so that He could die, for us. He gave us the most wonderful gift that first Christmas. The only gift we will ever need. A gift we are free to share with other people. That day in that manger He gave us Life.

For Josh and I, God chose to give us another gift. He gave us Raegan through a young woman named Chelsea. She gave us her daugther. We could never ask for a more wonderful gift.

Raegan has brought us so much joy, light and laughter. Her life has taught me so much about life. And God used her to teach me so much about trust, patience and peace. I trust God in a new way now. By that I mean, I truly trust Him. After what He did in my life by turning the darkest storm of infertility into the greatest gift, the adoption of Raegan, I have no choice but to trust Him with everything else.

This year we will exchange gifts. I am excited for Raegan to see her new toys tomorrow. But what I look forward to even more is being able to share with Raegan what Christmas means. Being able to share with her how much she is loved by us, but more importantly by God. Toys and gifts are fun. But God has already given us the only gift we ever need, all we need to do is receive it.

We are so thankful for the gift of Raegan. We are so thankful that her birthmom decided to choose us as her parents. I think about Chelsea this Christmas and hope that she is doing well. I think about last Christmas and about how much our life has changed in a year.

We praise God for His gifts. In God's first gift to me He gave me life. And in His holy and precious second gift to me he gave me a daughter who has changed my life.

We wish everyone a blessed Christmas. May you too experience the true joy and meaning of Christmas!